Dear Physical Body,
Thank you. Thank you so much for these many years of carrying me around, cleansing out my system, bringing blood to my extremities and otherwise balancing a series of sometimes bad inputs on my part— the countless times I have pummeled you with trans-fats, too much sugar or unnecessary, heavy, calorie- laden food. You have sifted through them beautifully breaking them down dutifully releasing the nasty and utilizing the good stuff and I am amazed at how quickly you bring us back to homeostasis.
Those times we have been wiped out from those foreign invaders entering your boundaries were ultimately a certain gain of stamina as you gained strength and learned to fight off new & unexpected foes. Bugs, viruses and other suspicious characters were hellbent on messing with us but you healed beautifully and tossed them out on their asses.
I apologize for putting you down when you have not appeared perfect. As I responded to the effects of time and intensity by hatefully threatening you with injecting toxins or cutting & slicing for merely showing a deep line carved from repetitive laughter or from some of the tragedies I have overcome I see now the error of my ways. I have repeatedly shamed you for showing inevitable signs of having lived a life. I’m sorry.
Here I sit fast approaching 60 and you are still carrying me dutifully, walking me down the many paths I choose, sorting through the debris I leave scattershot on your landscape offering little to no thanks, and even criticism for showing me the slightest weakness. Ultimately much to my amazement you stay powerful & strong. And by the way I understand one of the things I scream about repetitively, the sagging in our middle, is mostly my fault for not understanding that I must keep moving & strengthening all parts, not just the ones that are easy. And you being exhausted at 9pm? I get it now. It’s not due to you fading but due to the fact that I choose to hold your eyes to a screen five hours that day and when that daylight fades I sit still in the night in a pit of uneven cushions watching a bigger screen for another three.
I have not always treated you as the queen you are. I have not treasured you for the hoops you have jumped through and the rivers of energy you have carved out for my well-being— for you keeping our heart pumping and our circulation full and complete, despite my sometimes precarious choices. I will try to, more consistently, offer you the ultimate gift one can offer in this skin— compassion. You deserve it more than any other in my life. Every morning with the rising sun opportunities for change rise as well. I get to choose the course of the day— nourish you, move you with intention through all your ranges of motion, keep your abilities robust. I vow to to give you the stillness & silence you crave so that you can calm & balance, to laugh more so you can sink into the best feelings of all: joy & peace.
You are beauty & my best friend. You will be taken for granted no more. I love you and I always have, so you go— evolve in the way you need to evolve and I will offer you the unconditional love you deserve as we ride the crest of this aging wave together, enjoying cool water on our skin and the warm rays of sun on our ever-changing face.
With infinite love & gratitude,
Tricia